Celebrating 50 Years of Marriage
By Barbara A. Killmeyer
Since my husband Don and I recently celebrated our fiftieth wedding anniversary people have asked me what it is like to be married for fifty years. They also ask for tips on how we managed to achieve this apparently unusual state. I must admit that I don’t know what to tell them.
Our marriage has been filled with the usual wonderful times and sad times, but whatever the occasion, good or bad, we went through it together and I think that knowing the other was there for support helped to tighten the bond between us.
It amazes me when I think of how much we have both grown over the years. I can remember many years ago when we figured out how old we would be when the year 2000 rolled around and how I thought we would be too old to celebrate it. Wrong!
Somehow in the process of raising a family and earning enough money to pay the bills we learned to be tolerant and accepting of each other and of the faults we both have. But it wasn’t easy. There were, and still are, times when it becomes a real effort to keep a disagreement from escalating into an argument. But the important thing is that we keep trying.
On that note I would like to add that, in my opinion, those who brag about having the perfect marriage where there are never squabbles or disagreements are either fooling themselves or trying to fool you. Such a union does not exist between two people who have to adjust their different personalities, dreams and desires when they begin a life together.
When we began this marriage in 1954, the thought of being here, together, to celebrate our fiftieth anniversary seemed too far away to even think about. But, by working together, we did it. We raised two sons who grew to be men we are very proud of, and we now have two grandchildren who are the light of our lives. We have been able to smooth out most of the rough spots that occur in every marriage. We have learned to forgive, tolerate, understand and most of all to continue to love. We have also learned the value of humor in difficult situations. Laughter is so healing and brings everything to a level that can be dealt with more easily.
We have achieved that dream that we once thought would be impossible and now we look forward to the future and can’t wait to see what is in store for us. Whatever it is, we’ll see it through together.
The big puzzle to me, though, is: How could fifty years go by without us getting any older?
By Barbara Killmeyer